Hiiiiiii!

Okay, first of all,

My pelvis is very alive.

Very alive. I feel it constantly.

Basically, two months ago I fell of a horse. No biggie. I do it all the time. if anyone else rides you know it's the sacrifice you make. The second you get on a creature that can think for itself, the chances are, it may do something unexpected. In this beautiful giant's case, he got a little excited the grass had apparently been cut and when we went into canter he broncked, I slid off beautifully but landed myself with concussion and unknown to myself, a fractured pelvis. I didn't get the pain until about a month ago.

As some of you may remember I'm an elderly care sister. I practically live in a hospital. Well apparently, it's not really acceptable for your own patients to be offering you their zimmer frames and my consultant had essentially had enough of my limping and dragged me down to A&E. I was seen instantly, had an xray within an hour, waited for it to be reported on and the 'trapped nerve' I'd furiously told everyone I had turned into a hairline fracture of my pelvis.

Great I thought. No treatment, it's conservative management, mobilise as pain allows.  I'd essentially done 4 weeks of physio as I'd been working on the ward intensively chasing after the elderly so when they told me to go home and not bother coming back till fracture clinic three days later I wasn't impressed. Then I really wasn't impressed when fracture clinic told me I was having 2 weeks off. Then I really really wasn't impressed when yesterday, he informed me I had to have another 2 weeks off.. because I'm a nurse. I've also apparently pulled a tendon

My injuries aren't particularly severe. If I had chosen almost any other career path I'd be back at work and I know they're being cautious and I need to rest but it doesn't stop me feeling horrifically guilty.

I'm not sick. I feel perfectly well, I don't want to sit infront of the TV all day, or stay in bed. It's just uncomfortable and limits me from doing much more than walking down the street.

With my writing I've been really struggling. I'd been trying to manage everything I'd been dealing with personally with work. Work solved everything, it was a perfect excuse to get away from myself and my own thoughts as for 13 hours a day 28 people are in serious need of my attention. Being a sister, I also have the luxury of having 800 million other things to deal with, aka my student rota. (my poor students) plenty to keep me busy.

This injury unfortunately, has allowed me the time to remember everything I was trying to escape from.. but in a bizarre way, it's  been a blessing as it's allowed me to rediscover the joy of writing. Rediscover my muse, my motivation. I want to write again and I'm loving it.

So essentially, to wrap this incredibly long, (and boring, I'm sorry guys) blog post up, thank you horse, thank you for throwing me off, thank you consultant for being tired of my limping, thank you patients for being kind enough to offer your own walking aids to the poor nurse trying to put you above themselves. Thank you fracture clinic doctor for forcing me to have time off work and thank you to my boyfriend for making the suggestion of, 'you always say you miss writing. Why not try it again?'

I'm back in my happy place.