As eager as I am to apply Sorting Hat Chat (SHC) principles to Percy Weasley and analyze that whole...situation...I do not have the time or energy for that guy's bullshit right now. So I'm starting with his better half Audrey, who yielded results exactly as I imagined she might.

For anyone unfamiliar with Irrational, Audrey is subdued, kind, and competent, but has a certain lack of self-confidence. She's a hard worker, often putting in long hours, and cares about doing a good job, but she's not particularly ambitious. She sometimes struggles to find purpose or direction in her life, and some people may see her as boring. She tends to give people the benefit of the doubt and can be a doormat.

Audrey is a Hufflepuff Primary and a Hufflepuff Secondary. She can sometimes adopt a Ravenclaw Primary and/or Secondary Performance.

Why Hufflepuff Primary? (or, Why isn't someone a Slytherin just because they love their family and friends?)

Primary House is “why” someone does the things they do. According to SHC [all indented, italicized portions are from their site]:

Hufflepuff Primaries value people–all people. They value community, they bond to groups (rather than solely individuals), and they make their decisions off of who is in the most need and who is the most vulnerable and who they can help. They value fairness because every person is a person and feel best when they give everyone that fair chance. Even directly wronged, a Hufflepuff will often give someone a second (or fifth) chance.

Audrey is someone who believes in always being kind, and rarely is she judgmental (this is why she works so well with Percy; she accepts him for who he is instead of giving him grief for it). (And, by the way, SHC points out that a Puff doesn't necessarily have to be empathetic or even nice! But as to Audrey, this is part of the way her sense of loyalty to people manifests.)

One thing that gave me pause, and led me to a lot of thinking, is the "community" thing. Audrey is decidedly an introvert. She's a deeply private person, to the point of being aloof, and does not make friends easily. So how does this square with being a Hufflepuff? Well, nothing in the description of a Puff says they have to be a social butterfly, simply that they "prioritize fairness and equality, treating people justly because people are people." That does sound like Audrey! SHC also points out that this can manifest as loyalty to the ideals or traditions of a community, rather than a literal group of people. Audrey may not make many friends at work, but she feels a sense of responsibility to her bosses and coworkers. And when she meets her significant other's family (as she will in Chapter 14!) she feels a sense of responsibility to them, even if those relationships are not at all on the same level as the one with her partner.

The SHC description of a Slytherin, on the other hand, states in part that Slytherins are loyal to the people they care for the most. This is puzzling at first blush because, well, who the heck isn't? Isn't it sort of contemplated in the definition of family or friendship that your relationship is inherently different than with a stranger? Why aren't we all Slytherins just because we care for the people close to us? SHC has a whole section comparing and contrasting Puffs and Slytherins (which is something I really like that they do: analyze two Houses together to help show the distinctions). And indeed, SHC points out that Hufflepuff and Slytherin are both "loyalist" Primaries, rather than driven by ideals like the other two. And SHC points out that Gryffies, Puffs, and Claws can love the important people in their lives just as much as a Slytherin does. But SHC says that a Slytherin values themself and their people above all else, their highest priority, and they don't feel bad about that, just like they don't feel bad about having ambitions that are personal rather than idealistic. I don't think that Audrey, despite loving those close to her, thinks that she and her inner circle are necessarily any more important in the grand scheme of things than any other people. But that doesn't mean she wouldn't bend over backwards to make Percy or Vivian or her parents happy.

I think Audrey sometimes has a Ravenclaw Primary Performance. She feels more comfortable and functions better with rules and having a set order to things, imposed by some kind of external, defined system.

Why Hufflepuff Secondary?

Secondary House is “how” someone does things. Gryffies charge, Claws plan, Puffs toil, and Snakes improvise.

This is what makes a Hufflepuff: they show up. They do the work, often for no obvious gain except for the satisfaction of a job well done. This is the source of their power, and it is slowly gathered, not obvious to look at, and rarely spent.

For Audrey, I think this one is more obvious and involves less heartburn than the Primary. Audrey is a hard worker, slow and steady. And she does it without any particular expectation of getting anything in return -- for her, it's just what's expected of her, and what she expects of herself, to do a good job.

Both of these traits–niceness and toil–tie back to a sense of dedication. Hufflepuffs *mean* it. Whatever they are doing– loving or lying or laboring– they invest in it. Doing things partway is unsettling and ineffective. Where Slytherin draws strength from their quick wits, Gryffindor their shining integrity of intent, and Ravenclaw their pools of skills and knowledge, Hufflepuffs have an integrity of effort.

And of course, SHC points out that a Puff doesn't need to like people or be liked by people, nor do they need to devote their toil to everything imaginable. But as to what they believe in and care about, they believe in being reliable and trustworthy.

Finally, I like this little quote from SHC:

Hufflepuff Secondaries, often background characters even in their own lives, tend to make people feel safe. They’re likely to get secrets, to be allowed places they shouldn’t be, and to thoughtlessly be handed responsibility, powers, and favors. This is a very quiet power and one that can be used for either good or evil.

"A background character in her own life who tends to make other people feel safe" is a perfect description of Audrey, whose steadiness and trustworthiness (along with her obvious respect for and acceptance of Percy) make Percy feel safe enough to confide in her things he would rarely, if ever, tell another person. Additionally, it's her reliability and trustworthiness that earn her the distinguished role of being one of the few people who have Percy's ear. If he's being unfair to somebody, Audrey can gently point it out -- and, shocker, he'll listen! (E.g. her comments about his treatment of his subordinate Robbie in chapter 6.) Percy's not just listening to her because he fancies her and wants her to go out with him (though that may be part of it) -- he genuinely respects her and her judgment.

For similar reasons as Audrey uses a Ravenclaw Primary Performance, she also uses a Ravenclaw Secondary Performance at some points in her life, like at work. She likes to be prepared and methodical.

Next up... *side-eyes Percy*.