ink stains on my sheets by @shadowycorner

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eli does such a great job at writing a broken hermione after the war in this that it filled me with such longing for something and i don't know for what. hermione feels guilty, she's running but i don't think even she realises what or who she's running from, but she's so used to constant, terrible and unrelenting danger that she simply doesn't even know how to exist without fighting against (for) something and trying to stay alive. and that feeling is interspersed throughout this story but for me, one of the most heartbreaking moments was when she found her parents in australia and how devastated she was after seeing them happy, not knowing her. it broke my cold lil' heart. she decides to wander after that and that feels both like running away and finding herself. and she wants to be alone, away from ron and i legit loved how he took that. how he managed to take it and not completely get broken and try to understand her. and it legit felt like privilege being able to go on that journey with hermione. eli's descriptions are absolutely magnificent in this, and even while you're getting lost in them, along with hermione, you aso feel that she's still longing for something, but ultimately she needs space and freedom and not feeling like her life is in danger literally all the time to come to terms with the past couple of years of her life spent fighting in a war. it's a beautiful story of healing and finding herself and building back/finding that relationship with ron that she had but felt it was also breaking down for her. and she doesn't heal fully, nothing is perfect but it feels realistic and i love that.